Thursday, March 29, 2007

So Not Sincere!

I am so pissed! I hate the fact that I'm working with someone who is so insincere. So typical, hypocrite, two faced person! All this while I've been protecting her benefit, always put her on priority but look at what I've got? Insincerity.

My dispute with this person (I dont know if she's qualified to be called a 'person' or not) started yesterday evening. I received an sms from her, asking if she could switch her working shift with mine. It happens that I have promised to do make-up my friend for her wedding, so I told her I can't switch. Then she sms me, telling me 'fine, but next time I won't send you home anymore'. What the F**K? As if I always tumpang her car? I cannot tahan, so I called her. As I expected, she's the person with 1000000 excuses. She started saying that she doesn't feel good about me menumpang kereta dia masa balik. She never told me! If I knew that it's inconvenience to her, do you think I'll follow her car ka? Eeei...palis palis. When I pointed that out, she said 'I've told you before, but you never listen' OMG! WHEN??? She NEVER told me. NEVER NEVER NEVER EVER!. I'm not stupid or deaf! Semua yang dia pernah tolong aku dia ungkit Not only that, dia siap ungkit 2 tahun dulu punya cerita, when she helped me out by switching shift with me during Chinese New Year. I need to point out here that dia yag offer nak tukar shift at that time, bukan aku merayu-rayu pun. This kind of thing buat aku terfikir, aku tidak pernah tolong dia ka? Aku rasa aku lebih banyak tolong dia. I could tell her that right to her face if I want to. But I'm not like her. I help what I can with a sincere heart.


This is not the first time she hurts my feeling. Dari dulu lagi memang perangai dia menyakitkan hati. Penyibuk lagi tu. Segala-gala dia mau kurik (tapi x mengaku penyibuk). Bayangkan la begitu punya perangai. Tapi I just tahan dan sabar. Ikut hati, mau saja aku kasi penampar satu das piunggggg, biar dia rasa terpusing lapan kepala dia. Nasib baik dia sekarang 'sperminated' a.k.a pregnant. If not, I won't hesitate to smack her ugly face. Merasalah kau. Tangan aku ni lama sudah tidak bantai muka orang (cam gangster siut!). She's so lucky I'm not as ill-tempered as I was before. Let's just pray I stay that way. Believe me, you won't like me when I'm angry.

Aku ndak peduli la sekarang. Apa mau jadi, jadilah. Dia yang start, so from now on it's WAR baby! You wanna piece of me? Bring it on Biyatch!

I'm not sorry for any vulgar words I used against her and my blog, so just deal with it!

Saturday, March 10, 2007

I Hate Brendan!

HATE LIST

1) Brendan
2) Brendan
3) Brendan
4) Brendan
5) Brendan
6) Brendan
8) Brendan
9) Brendan
10) Brendan

I hate Brendan! I hate him to the bone! This guy is a senior in my company, recently promoted (on trial basis) as an 'Acting' Director. And he's got a MAJOR attitude problem. Major with a big M. Urgh, how I wish that I could just snap my finger and make him go far away from this world. He's the biggest butt kisser in the universe, boaster, bossy, two-faced evil with rotten front teeth (this is for real) and selfish! Infact, he's all the bad things you could ever think of. Seriously, this guy is the most hated person in my office.I'm not saying this because I'm jealous, I don't even care about promotion or whatever cause I love my job. It's just that I can't stand him anymore. The pain on my neck, that's what he is.

I still remember the first few month after I started working with my current company, this Brendan would call us to have a drink with him almost everyday (at that time he's just a guide). I thought, okay, it's nice of him to hang around with us, normal colleagues would do that. As soon as we sat, he began to: 1) Boast around about him being a tour guide of 12 yrs experience, he could do this, he could do that, no one can compete with him, bla..bla..bla.. (everytime, no joke!) 2) Bad-mouthing the management. We, the newbies sort of believe his words. Well, when you're new and this so-called 'experienced' senior staff told you things like that, you're tend to buy everything you've been told. Anyway, not everything he said is true. There's also warnings from other colleagues about him, but of course, we took their warnings for granted.

I began to see his true color when he's appointed as the in-charge person for our department. As usual, he pretended to be the most 'staff-concern' superior. The truth is, he only wanted to manipulate and uses us to do his work while he pretends to be busy doing only God knows what. He always find his way to boss people around. If there's a problem, he'll only make it worse instead of solving it. And now, he's an 'acting' director. Hah! I won't be surprise if everybody quit at once.

Just last Wednesday we had a meeting with him. He changed our duty roster and briefed us about it (acceptable). Then, when I suggested something, he snapped me by saying 'If you think you don't like it, you may as well leave' (totally unacceptable!). OMG! I was only suggesting something! He also said that he wont listen to staffs, but the staffs MUST follow his orders. He did mention something about us manipulating the management. At that point, I feel like laughing out loud because he was actually talking about himself - manipulating the management to his benefit. I told him we (me & my colleagues) will talk to our boss because we do not agree on certain thing he intended to implement.

I am so pissed and crossed at him. I can't take it anymore. I went to see my boss and told her what I felt about him (actually, I represent everybody in the office). Unfortunately that hog-face is not there (takut la tu), kalau tidak I don't know what will I do to him. When he came back shortly after, I heard my boss talked to him. Entah la pasal apa, but I guess dia kena 'cuci' by my boss cause he left with a sour face. Forgive me for saying this but FARK him! May he rot in hell for all I care!

For those who read this and know him, I wanna tell you guys that I'm not sorry. If you wish to tell him, be my guest. Tell him no one likes him so he might as well stop acting like a big jerk.

Whatever.

I feel so much better once I get this bitter feeling out of my system. From now on, he could kiss my big fat butt! I won't give him any respect. At all. I really mean it.

Sunday, March 4, 2007

Rumours, Criticism & Us

Seriously, I don't know why do people tend to make assumptions and speculations. If they saw two guys hugging intimately, they'll assumed that those two guys are gay. Never they thought of them as best of friend. If they saw a young girl and an elder man walk together, they'll assumed that the young girl is a mistress, a shameless trollop or the second wife while the truth is the girl and the elder man are father and daughter. Truth is, some of us are very quick to judge other people by one look. Then come the speculations and rumours and other stories that spreads quicker than you can say 'kabutz'. Especially if it's about artists and celebrities.

The best example is Ina & Mawi. People are still talking about them. I've heard and read so many theories about the reason of their break-off. I find it funny to have people a.k.a fans fighting with each other because of this (Ina or Mawi didn't even know them, yet they're fighting like crazy and wasting too much prepaid credit. How 'smart' is that? LOL). Some admits that they know Ina or Mawi and starts blaming him/her for the break up. They even 'create' their own version of it, which is pathetic. Some of it sounds so real you nearly buy it. However, I still believe that only Ina & Mawi have the answer. Even after their appearence on TV clearing the issue (which I think unnecessary and totally for the benefit of TV station) I know they're not telling the whole truth. Then again, it's their right, their personal life. If they opt for not sharing, have some respect and leave them alone. Not that I'm a fan of either one, I just think they're entitled to keep their private life protected.

Then the issue of Sharifah Amani @ Nani, saying 'I sound stupid when I speak in Malay'. She's accused of being 'lupa daratan' and 'berlagak'. To me, she's not 'berlagak' or 'lupa daratan', she's just comfortable speaking in english. What's the big deal, rite? But I was wrong. It became a big issue nationwide. Nani kena 'caras' habis-habisan. If that's not enough, they have to drag her parents in this after running out of ideas nak kena kan Nani. Thank God they're one professional and well educated family, they could handle this issue with style. Okay, she maybe wrong for saying that, but this is not the end of our Malay culture! *Doh*. Poor girl, some people are just too shallow and been living in a box. She's smart, very talented and I'm proud of her for speaking her mind. Anyways, case closed but her remarks still well remembered and used as a joke. Well, at least she made a history. Kudos to Nani!

Latest issue - Linda Onn and her dress. Again, people are pointing their fingers at Linda's direction, accusing her of being 'diva-ish' for refusing to wear local designer's dress and many more rumours came up after that. From what I read, she'll be wearing a dress by this Indon designer (named Jovian something..) but was instructed to wear another dress (by local designer) by JPM because Jovian is not local. It turns out that the dress by local designer is too sexy for Linda (according to paper reports). As a result, she backed out from the event. Honestly, I don't know if this is the truth. There's one comment I read stating Linda as 'unprofessional and a disgrace to our country', accompanied by vulgar words that is not appropriate for publishing. In my opinion, this is all about 'prinsip'. Linda has proved that she's one lady with a strong principal. Still, we don't know what really happened that makes Linda backed out. I agree that she should make a statement, explaining the truth. Still, it's her choice. No one can force her to say anything if she didn't want to. It's her right anyway.

These things makes me wonder sometimes. What would I do If I were in their shoes, being gossiped and speculated all the time? Will I accept? Will I just sit on a corner and weep till my eyes felt like boiled lychee? Will I fight? It's hard for me to say. When I was a teenager, I am known for my temper. Who ever talked bad about me behind my back, they'll pay the cost 'real good'. I fought back really hard. Oh no, I'm not a crook in school! I'm just the type of girl who has no fear to anyone. I'll fight back if I think I was right. But now, I became more and more patient (thank GOD). I've soften as I grew more matured. I like the new 'old' me. Yeah, I missed my younger, teenage days of course. Who doesn't? Well, we just have to move on and deal with our facts of life.

Ooops..a bit side tracked. Sorry. I hope you guys get what I mean. Somebody saw something, tell someone, pass it around and speculate about it. This will goes on and on and on on. Some stories have been exaggerated to make it more exciting. Ironically, sometimes we know that the whole stories have been exaggerated, but stupidly, we too passed it on. What ever. I have accepted the fact that no matter how we try to stop this syndrome, we can never succeed. Only miracle could make it stop.

Am I right or am I right?

Tuesday, February 27, 2007

Conquering My FEAR


Here's me posing with my Uncle's Honda Shadow. Because of this bike, my uncle and aunt (newly married), dubbed as Awie & Erra. Actually I nearly wet my pants when I sat on this bike. Yes, I'm scared of motorbike! I took picture with this monster to get this phobia out of my system once and for all.
I remembered years ago when my dad bought a motorbike for my bro, I thought I'd take it for a ride. Well, tried to cause I don't know how to pandu motor at that time (I'm still clueless till now). So, I started the engine asked my bro 'What's next?' Without warning, he go and pulas the handle, I think the one yang contol minyak tu and the bike went vrooooommmm...crashing straight to our pagar. Yang bestnya, I'm still ON the bike. Terkejut beruk you! Nasib baik the only eye witness to that embarassing scene is my 'clever' brother (which is still as bad cause he mocked me about this until now). So to cut the story short, I don't have the nerve to ride on motorbike eversince (and will never want to. Posing on it for pictures is acceptable, but that's as fas as I can go). I'll stick to car or public transportation.
Kissy kissy, till next time

Sunday, February 25, 2007

The Baby Story

You know, it's amazing that almost all of my married colleague are now pregnant! Started with our Account Manager, Chua, followed by my Section head, Zaiton, berjangkit pulak to my Director, Jenny and the latest pregnant lady is my bestfriend Wan Azlyna yang baru je kahwin last December. Habis la, berturut-turut maternity leave diorang.

Sekarang ni kat office takde lain topik lagi dah. Asal lunch break aje, cerita baby and labour. Biasa le tu, tak sabar nak ada baby baru. Kitorang yang masih maintain ni jadi tukang dengar aje. Kesian jugak kat Pat, my other colleague. Masa Wan announce that she's pregnant, muka Pat nampak sedih sangat. Up to now mood dia macam tak berapa best, asyik monyok aje. Ye lah, orang yang baru kahwin dah mengandung, dia yang dah 2 tahun kahwin belum ada tanda nak pregnant. Apa nak buat, takde rezeki. Sabar aje la.

When I told my mom about all the pregnant woman in my office, she said 'Good for them. Their mom must be so happy. Yang aku ni tak tau bila nak rasa timang cucu. Bila laaaa kau nak kahwin?'. Oh. my. God! Not again! I've been harrassed by this question before, but since my aunt got married last year at the age of 30, this particular question became more and more annoying. Not only from my mom, but from my whole family. Since I am the eldest niece of both side, I understand their eagerness to see me tie the knot, but why cant they understand (and I'm sick of saying this) that I've not met 'The One' for me. Don't get me wrong, I do have boyfriends before, but I don't feel my heart goes 'boingggg' with them. Yes, I loved them but I don't think I love them enough to think about marriage. Conclusion is: They're not THE ONE for me. If they are, my heart will leap like a sumo wrestler bouncing on trampoline. Don't ask me how I know coz I just knew it would.

Memilih? Of course! Ingat kahwin ni benda remeh? This is a lifetime commitment we're talking about. It's also my future, which allows me to be picky and choosy. I want to be married to someone who could provide me in all aspect. By saying this, I know mesti ada yang salah faham dan fikir yang I ni tak kisah lelaki jenis apa pun, laki orang ke, tua bangka ke, yang penting ada duit. Well, for those who knew me well, they know I'm not that stupid. I ada akal yang dipinjamkan Allah, so I know what's best for me. Tak kisah la kalau ada yang nak kutuk or disagree with me. This is my opinion. Lantaklah, suka ke tak suka yang penting I'm honest and tak hipokrit.

I really, really hate the phrase 'ulat dalam batu pun boleh hidup' or 'wang tak penting asalkan ada kasih sayang'. Zaman 'Ibu Mertuaku' dulu boleh la. Even in the film itself shows that kalau takde duit, macam-macam boleh jadi. Sampai Sabariah pun lari sebab Kassim Selamat takde duit. Padahal masa bercinta dulu dia tak pandang pun semua tu. For me, wang dan kasih sayang mesti seimbang.

That is why I'm still single at the age of almost 29. I'm still searching for someone yang dapat memenuhi kriteria yang I cari. But whatever it is, I also believe in jodoh. Maybe I tak dapat apa yang I cari. Maybe I dapat someone yang totally opposite. Who knows kan? Anyway, when there's a will, there's a way. Apa-apa pun, kita tunggu dan lihat cause yang merancang kita, yang mengkabulkan Allah SWT. Insya Allah....

Wednesday, February 21, 2007

First Post Intro

I'm so lucky to be born as a 'rojak'. My dad is half Jawa, half Pakistani, mom is half Chinese, half Kadazan. I get to celebrate Hari Raya, Christmas, Chinese New Year and Ka'amatan, and I am really grateful for that advantages. The disadvantage of celebrating four festive season in a year is, I always have to fight with my HR department everytime I apply for leave *sigh*. Oh well, I don't care cause my leave approved anyway :)

Actually, I'm still pretty tired after Chinese New Year's celebration at my grandparent's house. As usual, I'll be slaving away in the kitchen, preparing foods for 'our side' (muslims), and my Uncle Ong preparing foods for 'their side' (non-muslims). Not to worry, cause we have two separate kitchen. My grandparents knew very well about 'halal' and 'haram'. Oh, and we have additional family member this year - my aunt's hubby, Pakcik Boo. This is his first time celebrating Chinese New Year with us.

I guess I'll tell you about CNY celebration in my next post. My eyelids are begging me to close them and my pillows are calling my name and singing me lullabies. Until then, see ya!